Has anyone ever told you, “When disaster strikes, we are coming to your place!” But when disaster strikes—be it a hurricane, earthquake, or economic collapse—and family, friends, or even their friends show up at your door, are you ready to welcome them with open arms and keep your home running smoothly? It’s time to think this through and develop a plan to ensure you don’t have to live in chaos!

Today, I’m sharing how to set clear rules and boundaries to ensure everyone thrives, based on Dr. Kyle Christensen’s “Who’s Coming to Dinner?” worksheet. You can download a free copy to help you with your planning.

Let’s dive in with optimism and practical know-how! Watch these great, thought-provoking video interviews with Dr. Christensen. There are four videos covering various subjects on the worksheet.

The Scenario: Your Home Becomes a Refuge

Crisis hits and your home is the safe haven for family, friends, maybe their in-laws, and even some pets. Kids of all ages, elderly relatives, and unexpected guests arrive with little more than the clothes on their backs. It’s exciting to help, but without a plan, your sanctuary could turn into a stress zone. The good news? You can create a harmonious, safe environment by setting rules and boundaries upfront. You need to personalize this plan for yourself, but here are some important things to consider.

Step 1: Know Who’s Coming and Plan Their Space

First, make a list: who’s definitely coming (family, close friends), who might show up, and who could tag along (in-laws’ friends, anyone?). Don’t forget pets—Fluffy the cat or Rover the dog might join the party! Estimate your “possible” and “probable” headcount to plan sleeping arrangements. Got beds, cots, or hammocks? Stock extra blankets, sleeping bags, and clothing for those who arrive empty-handed. Create private spaces with curtains or dividers—everyone needs a little corner to call their own.

Boundary Tip: Set clear rules, like “No kids jumping on our bed!” to protect your space and keep things fair.

A huge thank you to Arlynn and her husband for providing this Emergency House Guest Briefing. It’s wonderful to see how others are planning to handle this!

Step 2: Establish Leadership with Love

When your house fills up, someone needs to steer the ship. As homeowners, you’re the natural leaders—think of yourself as a “noble leader” with advisors from your group, not a dictator! Avoid chaos by skipping full consensus (everyone agreeing 100% rarely works). Instead, hold a family meeting to assign roles based on skills: a head cook, security officer, medic, or emotional counselor.

Boundary Tip: Create a short, signed “Code of Conduct” for everyone, covering respect, no violence, and pitching in. For example, “Everyone helps with chores, no exceptions.” This keeps expectations clear and fosters teamwork.

Step 3: Food and Sanitation—Non-Negotiables

Feeding a crowd is a big task, so plan for two meals a day to stretch supplies. Inventory your food: how many people can you feed for how long? Ensure it’s properly stored and consider water sources if plumbing fails. Assign a cook and cleanup crew, and address picky eaters or allergies with kindness but firmness—snacks might be limited! Sanitation is life-or-death: set up compost toilets (3–4 bins for 10–20 people, per Joe Jenkins’ Humanure Handbook), handwashing stations, and stock soap, bleach, and sawdust.

Boundary Tip: Enforce kitchen rules (e.g., “No free-range snacking”) and hygiene standards (“Wash hands before meals”) to prevent waste and disease.

Step 4: Keep Everyone Safe and Sane

Security and emotional health are crucial. Assign a security officer to watch for internal or external threats, and set rules for weapons use to avoid “loose cannons.” Keep everyone busy with chores, games, or worship to boost morale and prevent tension. Support diverse beliefs with inclusive meetings, and have a counselor ready for PTSD or anxiety.

Boundary Tip: Only trusted members invite new guests, and infractions (like theft or disrespect) mean consequences—possibly relocation. A signed agreement with a probation period ensures everyone’s on the same page.

Step 5: Plan for the Long Haul

What if your guests stay longer than expected? Assess finances—can those with means contribute? Stock extra supplies like fuel, tools, and winter clothing. Plan for special circumstances: births, deaths, or celebrations.

Boundary Tip: Regularly review your rules and adjust as needed. If someone’s not fitting in, have an exit strategy (e.g., moving them to a community shelter) to protect your tribe’s harmony.

Your Action Plan

You’ve got this, preppers! Start today:

1. Download the Worksheet: Grab Dr. Christensen’s “Who’s Coming to Dinner?” at the top of this post to list your tribe, supplies, and roles.
2. Set Rules Early: Draft a Code of Conduct with clear boundaries (e.g., “Respect private spaces,” “Everyone works”).
3. Prepare Supplies: Stock bedding, food, sanitation items (like compost toilet bins), and medical supplies.
4. Communicate: Hold a family/tribe meeting to assign roles and discuss expectations before the crisis hits.

Work on Your Crisis Influx Plan Today!

Disasters don’t have to mean chaos. With clear rules and boundaries, your home can be a beacon of hope for your loved ones. Follow The Provident Preppers for more ways to build a resilient, joyful tribe. Let’s prepare together and keep the faith—because family is worth it!

Thanks for being part of the solution!

Jonathan and Kylene Jones